ARE YOUR MEETINGS AN AUDIENCE WITH ROYALTY?

I wonder if you know the amount of time people spend preparing for a 
conversation with you.  Especially if it's a private conversation on a pivotal topic.
They will talk to others to try to get your orientation to the meeting. They'll prepare for what they think it will be.  Will it be casual, will it be decisive, is it a sounding out about others.  What is the right preparation?  

You mood and your method with be examined and talked about with others.
"Well, s/he usually likes to---------.  S/he doesn't like it when------------.
Be sure not to------------------.  Don't worry about------------------------.
Even you direct reports will consult with one another so this is not about levels of power only.  But it is about power.  

Good power is all about getting something done.  The trick is to direct people to getting the good right things done and NOT about pleasing power out of fear or hope of goodies to come.  Meetings with just you and a person with something at stake trigger pleasing you---and the fear of not .

I like a bit of tension in a meeting that involves bringing your best thought and expecting solid push back and discussion.  But the over rehearsing that can go on and the foolish waste of time to make things look good (better than they are) is a form or organizational waste.  You need the exact opposite--easy candor without fear or over-pleasing.  This is a constant bug-a-boo for you in your top role.  Don't think the dynamic doesn't exist because you are sincere in not wanting it. 

You can minimize the waste of this over prep time by being clear with people about what the meeting will be like and what you will want and need.  For example:

l.  Informal and conversational---just want to talk and think with you and open a topic.  No immediate outcome.  

2.  Informal in tone but serious about outcome--just want to talk and air a tough situation a decision will be needed at the end of the meeting. The topic is X. Come with thoughts only.

3.  Tough dilemma to discuss.  This is the topic.  Come prepared with written analysis and solutions.  Keep it to three pages.  No decision til further involvement of others.

4.  Important talk with you about development.  No preparation needed. 
It is about a future possibility.  

How you set up meetings can either help productivity or hurt it.
The longer the time is between the request for a meeting and the actual meeting, the more time will be spent OVER preparing.  Work with your admin to set the topic, tone and parameters for your individual meetings. It will save a lot of wear and tear and fear in your company.
  

YOU ARE ON THE ICE ALL OF THE TIME

I have been watching the Olympics.  The event that gets to me is the solo ice-skating events.  It is the very definition of accountability.  The lone skater carries it all in that moment.  Everything he or she does counts right then and there.  It can go from grace to disgrace in a nano-second.  An unwanted result often undeserved.  The ice can be bad, the coach can be lousy, the culture and atmosphere foreign. So what?  It's a no excuses moment.

But the skater does come off the ice.  You can see them fold or exalt the moment the music stops.  Their performance persona drops.  They can hide.
They can relax in-between events.  The on-stage events are short compared to the off the stage time.

Not so for you dear top exec.  You are on the ice with the spotlights on most of the time.  It is an odd blind spot to mention, but don't get inured to this reality.
You have to do what the lone skater does only more so:
Keep the vision of success in your mind
Stay calm under exceeding pressure
Pick yourself up fast after a mistake and proceed immediately
Maintain dignity and grace
Smile in public defeat
Get right back to preparing 
Stay in the game

Only you are on the ice much much longer than the skater with many fewer moments to hide or prepare or regroup.  So remember that spotlight and that music.  Behind them is an audience watching you closely and judging too.

ONE OF YOUR MOST POWERFUL ALLIES IS----

That would be your admin person.
I once gave a key note to 500 admin support people for top executives.
I talked with ten ahead of time and then did an on the spot assessment with the tables.  Think flip charts.

Here's what they said that still pertains.

NUMBER 1.  Say hello to me everyday and good-bye too.

NUMBER 2.  Remember that I am your PR person.  Everyday all of the time
                 I can make you look good or bad with a roll of my eyes.

NUMBER 3.  I see so much from where I sit.  Ask me about it.  Especially if you
                 are planning a change.  Everyone talks to me.

NUMBER 4.  Confidentiality can be hard on me as it is on you.  I can't say 
                 anything to anyone so if we talk it helps.

NUMBER 5.  Keep me tied into the business picture.  It helps me make a 
                 thousand tiny decisions that make your life better.

Number 6.  I am your partner.  Treat me like one.

Keep this power in mind.  Your admin is in a very powerful role.